So we started swimming lessons this fall with Sully and Lucy. Sully LOVED it. Jumped right in. Was gliding under the water after the first lesson. 4 weeks and he graduated to the next level. Total natural. Well I quit those lessons, A) because they are stupidly expensive. It's a month long membership for $60/kid. If there's a holiday on your swimming day (like Thanksgiving during our Thursday lessons) you don't get your fee prorated. B) Lucy isn't old enough yet to go into lessons without a parent. So that means I'm with her in the parent-tot classes. Totally cute water bonding right? WRONG. Sobbing, screaming, I-don't-want-to-sing-your-goddamned-songs little toddler. C) It's a freakin' hike. Took about an hour and 15 minutes to get from my school, to Sully's school, to Lucy's school, to swimming. D) Swimming lessons were during our normal dinner time. Need I go on?
Sooooooo....DU was running a special in December where you got $10 off of a 7 week session if you signed up the day we had a snowstorm. Random. So I did it. $79 for 7 weeks. I put him just the lowest level so he would be confident in his new class. After a 6 week break from lessons, we started our new class. There were 4 little kids, Sully being one of the oldest at 5. The teacher came over to introduce herself and all signs were pointing towards awesome...she has the exact same color of bright orange hair as Sully, is equally covered in freckles, and her name is LUCY! Perfect? Nope. He sits down on the side of the pool and starts sobbing. This lasts, I crap you not, 15 of the 30 minutes he's in lessons. The last 15 minutes he whimpered through all the basics he'd mastered at his old lessons, acting like he'd never been in the water before. The teacher came up and just said he needed to regain his confidence in the water. Fine. But they could stand to raise the pool temp a wee. Poor kid was freezing. She suggested a swimming cap and rash guard. Done.
Week 2 was an improvement. After much pep talking, he confidently walks over to the side of the pool, decked out in a rash guard and super awesome swim cap...and starts wailing. But this time for only the first 12 minutes. WTF? Again he reluctantly gets in the pool after 15 minutes and struggles through the second half of the lesson, checking to see if I'm still watching every 2.5 seconds. I mean seriously. AND I was hoping to put Lucy in the same class when she turns 3 in a month. I had mentioned this to the instructor and she laughed thinking I was just playing some kind of cruel joke. Nope. Totally serious lady.
Tonight is week 3, and I'm armed with a sucker bribe. Zero tears = Prize sucker reward. I keep telling him to trust his teacher, that he'll be warmer in the water, that he needs to get comfortable in there before summer camp this June. I'll be keeping you posted but would love possible solutions other than stooping to bribery...which I've already done...Whoopies.
I have no dazzling advice on this one, but am sending lots of good vibes and encouragement your way! Let us know how it goes.
ReplyDeleteN has never sobbed through a lesson, but she certainly doesn't always apply herself to the task at hand. She is perfectly happy to splash around and giggle with the other kids and not give even a teensy bit of effort towards learning how not to drown. Which is why we ended up switching from the expensive fancy-pants lessons over to the rec center.
Two weeks ago, she was invited to a birthday party at the local pool. Most of the kids there were pretty decent swimmers, and I was hoping that she would feel a renewed sense of interest in learning to swim, owing to a smidge of self-consciousness at being the only one forced to wear a life vest in 3 feet of water. No such luck. She totally didn't care. So motivation won't come via shame, either. Damn.
If my kid hated soccer or piano, I'd let them quit. Why pay for something that they don't enjoy and that eats up your free time? But swimming is totally different because it's a safety issue. As far as I'm concerned, learning this skill is non-negotiable, and my kids will take lessons until they are confident in the water. So it really sucks when they're unhappy!
Basically, I'm not sure what I'd do in your situation. Do you think he's the type of kid who would be more comfortable learning from you, or another adult that's close to him? Or - random but you never know - have you made sure he's gone to the bathroom shortly before his class starts? I'd have a hard time settling into a lesson if it was poopin' time. Lastly, does he have a buddy you could talk into signing up for lessons with? Some kids tend to be way more brave (or at least fake it) if there's someone in class that they'd hate to lose face in front of...
Stick to it, mama! Good luck! And don't feel too guilty about the bribes.
Hmmmm, how'd the last few lessons go? Maybe it was just a rough adjustment period? New things are hard. And, I have heard that the water at DU is really really cold! I worked with a woman who taught swim classes there and she said all her students were miserable.
ReplyDeleteI would sit down with little man and ask him why he's crying. But, do it when he's calm and thinking clearly and can verbalize. Our IQs are lowered by about 25 points when we're melting down, so it's not the time to get his best thinking! Then you can explain why you want him to take the lessons-- not just to torture him, but so he can enjoy camp! I bet if you can get his concern on the table, you guys could come up with some mutually satisfying solutions for making swim class more tolerable.
Also, the classes at the YMCA are pretty affordable and LaLa loves them. They could take classes together, which might be motivating. Hang in there. I hate the swim refusal! We went through it this summer and it was torture.